CHAPTER 7
By the time Larry reached home, his mind was like the orchard, through which a tempest had just passed, bringing down the tall, old ones in a single stroke and revealing tender, beautiful saplings, which were so far hidden by the trunks of the ancient ones and were considered forbidden owing to a few false and senseless myths passed through an old genetic creeper, which itself was rooted in a solid evidence, decrying the myths and exposing the fallacy of them.
An irony at its worst, which had suffocated him since he had his physiology lessons from his classmates-cum-teachers, forcing him to suppress a yearning for something which was so near and yet so far.
He did not, however, dare to go near Cathy. After all, Old beliefs seldom vanish. Familiar paths are safer, although they deny new flowers and fruits.
Lilly and Cathy filled his mind.
What they will be thinking?
What they would think if they find out about my desire?
A frustrated, yet attractive lady and a loving, beautiful woman.
But they are something else too.
A friend's wife and a saviour-mom.
Lovely dishes, as Rakesh says. Tasty too.
But it is not proper to desire them.
What is to be done?
The confusion remained within him. He found that he has become unable to take a decision and act.
But something has to be done. Before time runs out.
He liked to concentrate his attention to the less risky path. With a positive response.
Towards Lilly, the fragrance of whose enticing, hidden smile still existed within him fresh as a newly-born flower.
But there was danger in it too.
Rakesh.
He had not met Rakesh, since that date, when Rakesh had taught a few lessons about human relations.
Larry used to go out daily in search of a job, but his thoughts were reined by the two ladies.
About one week had passed and yet his thoughts remained as it were.
One day he returned home early. All along the way, he tried to force his thoughts towards Lilly, but they did not stick there and flew towards Cathy and eventually settled upon her.
He was not expecting Cathy at home but when he reached, Cathy was at home. She was taking the usual evening bath.
He had just entered in, when she came from the bathing place. Having thought that she is alone at home, she had not taken due care to dress properly before coming out. And she did not see him.
But he had. She was so beautiful. In the wet clothes, she looked marvellous. She was in the process of drying her long, dark tresses with a towel and drops of water were still falling down, wetting further her scant clothing. Through the breach of her upraised arm, the front of her body was clearly visible to him. She was leaner than he had thought and there was no excess fat in her body. With perfect projections, slits and dips, she had a well proportioned body to attract an average worshipper of feminine beauty and Larry, seeing a semi -nude female the first time, felt as if something boiled within him and will escape through the pores of skin any time. His vision blurred and a strange noise from his brain whirred in his ears making him deaf.
He caught the near-by chair for support.
Hearing the movement of the chair, Cathy turned with a start.
Although his face was hidden, she recognized him. She felt panicky fearing that he is sick and in need of help and ran towards him, oblivious of her insufficient clothing.
She lifted him up and asked, “What happened? Are you not well?â€
Larry stood erect and looked up. His glassy stare increased her consternation further.
“Come on, come on son, what is happening? Tell me, tell me son.â€
She did not know what to do. She feared that her world is falling apart. Did he take some intoxication like her father? Is he ill? Did he feel himself away and separate from her for not being his real mother? Is it that about which her mind was afraid of?
Larry hardly heard what she uttered. He did not dare to look at her face and his downward gaze was obstructed by two exquisite curves, which were not properly hidden by her bathrobe and had a beauty dip between them, that he lost all control of himself and put his hands around her and hugged and fondled and squeezed her tightly, kissing her neck and breasts in a hurry.
The extreme pressure awakened her nerves and she knew his intention.
Desperately, she pushed him backwards so strongly that he lost his balance but came to his senses. He looked up.
And she took a step backward and slapped him on both cheeks with such a terrific force that he sat down holding his face in both hands.
“You? You dare to do this? To me? To me? She fumed hysterically. “You are an animal. A dirty creature. To me like this? To me? What did I not do for you? I brought you up as my own son and this is what you were thinking all along?â€
She could not proceed further. Anger, sorrow and frustration choked her.
Her legs lost their strength, forcing her to sit in front of him.
She covered her face with both hands and sobbed violently.
Larry sat there for a long time. His eyes were on her face, but they did not register anything in his brain. It was as if a violent storm was raging in and through him, reaching his innermost, making him incapable to think. A terrific heat covered him as the consequence of the sin he had committed.
He pressed his head with both hands as if it was going to burst into pieces.
Gradually it all reduced. In their place, a deep feeling of unforgivable guilt prevailed.
He loathed himself.
What to do?
He found it impossible to face his mom any longer. He had no right to remain in the house as her son.
How would she have felt, when I betrayed her trust?
I am a senseless, shameless, thankless brute.
To ill - behave with my dear mom.
She cannot forgive me.
I have to go away from her.
I will die if it can make her happy.
But will that?
He took a decision and got up.
And once the turbulence had reduced, Cathy started to reason with herself. She removed her hands and sat with closed eyes.
May be, I took it in a wrong sense.
He may be having some serious problem or may be, he is sick. If so, to whom he will go?
He has nobody else in the world to give him love, to console him. And if he had come to me for comfort and in his perplexity, had to stick to me as he used to do when he was a child, how can I find fault with him?
It was my meanness. Not accepting him as my son.
Otherwise, how could a mother think like that? The dependence and closeness of a son as an expression of passion?
How terribly he would have suffered?
Yet it was not fully solved. She still experienced the pressure of his hugging hands and the heat of the kisses planted by him on her neck and breast.
Were they not a reflection of his passion towards a woman?
She could not decide. She was helpless. What to do now?
She opened her eyes again with great effort. Larry was squatting in front of her, as if he wanted to touch her feet, but decided against it.
Larry thought that she was asleep. She seemed so peaceful and dignified. He felt his heart go all out to her. Now there was not even a trace of the madness in him.
He touched her feet and then covered them with his hands.
“Mom.†He called softly.
She could not contain herself.
It is my child. He cannot do any wrong to me. He is my only relief.
She bent forward and took his hand in hers.
“Mom.†He called again. Tears filled in his eyes. The purity of his present state of mind was clear in them.
“Don't cry my child.†She said.
“Mom†I….I ….. Will…..†He could not continue. His sobbing had gone beyond his control.
“Don't. Don't cry my son.'
She took his face in her hands, kissed him on his forehead and made him lie down upon her shoulder. Patting his head and shoulder affectionately, she moved to and fro like a mother trying to put her small baby asleep. The same breast, which made him feel an uncontrollable pang of passion a little while ago, was now the perfect place for him to keep his cheeks, which were still burning from her slap. She had now no doubt that, if at all, it was a temporary aberration of his mind, from which he had recovered fully now and hereafter he will be her dear, dear son.
She held him close to her heart, while she went on saying in a low, affectionate tone that she was his mother and he was her son, as if it was some incantation to ward off the evil of passion from his mind.
Later, she woke him up. Fed him and ate in the same plate, which was her usual routine.
It was a night, after so many nights, that they both slept peacefully.
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